Saturday, August 16, 2008

Camping in upstate New York: a monologue by P-rock

"We going campin', Mama? We going onna train? Why we are ridin' on a train? Onna outside train? It not a subway train, it's an outside train that goes outside? We lookin' at the river? Oh, I like the river. I like the - look! A boat! I like boats! I like boats! We jes' ridin' onna train, lookin' at the boats..." etc.

"We hikin', Mama? We hikin now? Why we hikin'? I like hikin'. We not walkin'? We jes' hikin'? Oh, I like hikin'. Look, a stick! I pick it up. I like sticks. I like this big stwong stick. I poke things with it? I can poke that mushroom? I poked it. It fall down? Look, anudder stick! I pick it up too. I like this stick. It's pofect. I like sticks. I pick up anudder stick and anudder stick, an so many sticks. Here Mama, this stick is for you. You carry these sticks so I can pick up this udder stick. I not like this stick, this stick is fuzzy. There some fuzzy stuff on this stick. I pwetendin' it's an ant. It's not an ant? Do ants pee? Do mooses pee? I pwetendin' this stick is a moose. Hey guys, wait up, I hafta let my moose pee. He needsa pee now. Pee, pee pee. Ok. Look, what's that? What's that, Matt? That a toad? Why that toad hoppin', Matt? I think that toad supposed ta be hoppin'. He not hikin'...." etc.

"Woah, look at the tent! I like tents! I like gettin' in tents! I can get in that tent, Mama? I can get in that tent and take off my shoes? Take my shoes off! I gettin' in the tent. I like gettin' in the tent. I can stay wite heah? I can stay in dis tent and not take a nap? I can not take a nap and I can stay in this tent and stay and stay in it? What's this? This a landerin?" (a lantern) "I can use this landerin? I can push the button and turn it on? I like this landerin. I like pushin' the button. Who gave this landerin to me? The campsite man? The campsite man gave me this landerin? Oh, that was nice of him. I can turn it on." etc.

"I can have some marshmallows? Oh, I like marshmallows. I can cook it? I can cook it wif this stick? Why I can cook it wif this stick, Dada? Can I cook it? Is it cooked? Is it onna stick next to the fire? Oh, I like the fire. I can put my marshmallow next to the fire and not on the fire so I can jes' cook it. I can eat it? It not hot? Can you blow on it, Mama? It not hot? Why it not hot? I can eat it. Mmm, that's alicious. I LIKE marshmallows. It taste like chocolate." etc.


At 11:02 PM, Blogger clairesd said...

i think marshmallows are 'alicious too. who's he calling 'matt'?

At 11:13 PM, Anonymous C said...

Such a talker, that one. I wish I were camping in upstate NY. But I'll be camping in Upper Egypt this week... And sure to bother my colleagues with lots of questions. Can I take a picture here? Can I? I like my camera. Do you like my big lens? No, you don like it? Why u no like it? You want to send the police to take me away? What's an escort?

At 1:46 PM, Anonymous katiek said...

I'm exhausted reading just the first paragraph, little too close to home maybe?

At 12:05 PM, Blogger ben said...

hi larious

At 9:17 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

wait... this is so familiar. this is a deja-you moment!

-yer mama

At 7:18 AM, Blogger RB said...

Sounds like me when I'm ... well, it sounds like me at certain times. :)


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